The Gifts We Offer as Leaders
Welcome, everyone! I hope you all are enjoying the sunshine and warm temps this week! Many of us are preparing to return to the office soon, and trying to think about the fresh energy we’ll need to lead with courage and strength. The MEMSPA community is so supportive of you all, and I’m so glad you’re here and part of that!
I’ve had the opportunity to read much of Travis Bradberry’s work this summer. His newest book The New Emotional Intelligence has affirmed some of the leadership qualities I’ve always believed help our people sustain their strength over time. Recently on LinkedIn, he published “9 Things Smart People Won’t Do”—a catchy title, right? Three of his reminders resonated with me as school leaders think about leading right now.
Don’t Let Anyone Limit Your Joy
Bradberry says smart people won’t let anyone limit their joy. Isn’t that a lovely thought? No one is in charge of your choosing joy, resilience, or well-being but you… there’s tremendous power in that.
What might choosing joy look like? It’s being awake to the small moments available to bring a bit of light and warmth into your world. It’s holding the door for someone, tipping your server really well, writing an appreciative note and mailing it, spending time listening to beautiful music, having a campfire, seeing a sunset—I bet you have so many other ideas! What if we went into our new school year making a commitment that joy was going to be key to how we show up in our schools? I’m thinking that joy might spread, and guess what? I’m also convinced that setting the brain to experience wellbeing and joy is really, really good for the learning culture.
Don’t Prioritize Perfection
Bradberry also shares that really smart people won’t prioritize perfection. When we do that, it’s really the opposite of choosing joy, isn’t it? If we’re only happy if we can be perfect, we’ll never meet that goal! Instead of viewing our growth as a journey, we’ll want an end product that is absent of failure and risk. We’ve sapped our life of energy for anything else—like learning from our risks and the bumps in the road, or taking time to cultivate those relationships that mean so much.
One other consideration: Leaders who are focused on being “armored up” and presenting a perfect exterior are almost completely unapproachable. They’re not going to make connections with their team, and instead will cultivate a toxic, inauthentic culture where no one really knows each other, and their team certainly won’t trust each other. In contrast, leaders who model vulnerability and openly share their own learning are giving a gift of authenticity to their people—one that will result in a culture based on real relationships, making progress because we share our struggles together and surrounding your team in trust.
Don’t Dwell on Problems
Third, Bradberry shares that really smart people won’t dwell on problems. I often tell people, “We’re not going to sit and admire that problem anymore! What can we control or influence about this?” In times of transition, we coach people to move beyond what they have lost or are grieving for, and move toward naming the assets they still possess, and thinking about the possibilities their new reality may open up for them.
The 2025 Gallup World Survey showed that for the first time, the concept of “hope” was deemed a bit more important than the element of “trust” in leaders. Our world, your school, your community, and your own family need you to be a voice of reality, but a voice that owns the path toward the future and is proactive about modeling that hopeful leadership mindset. Asking your team, “If we’re in a dark time right now, what might be a silver lining in the cloud?” can help—as can remembering the beautiful words of Maya Angelou, “Every storm runs out of rain.”
As We Begin This Fall
As we begin this fall with new energy and new challenges, my hope is that you’ll think just a bit about:
- Expanding your sense of joy; creating and appreciating those small moments
- Setting your mindset on the journey of improvement instead of the impossible goal of perfection
- Being an active participant in your school community as you model hopefulness and creative problem-solving
I hope you’ll offer these gifts to your people, and I wish you well!
Debbie